Climb out of bed at 2am in the morning. My throat is dry. My notes are on replay in my mind.
Know how music plays on replay in your mind. Cases, and sections of Act and the constitution replay in the same way. They haven't ever played like that, but am making them play.
Just like you don't need to think to recite the words in a song, I want the basic knowledge to flourish in my career to be second nature to me.
I wear something warm, a coat, I wear a pair of pants and my gloves. I pick the car keys and I drive slowly to town.
Two, three more years to go before am a lawyer.
I stop just outside the court room. I get out of the car. I look at the old building. No one is around, the watchmen are asleep. I touch the soil with my hands, I sit on the tarmac right there in the parking lot. It doesn't matter to me that I jumped over the fence.
I look at the building. This is where I am going to shine. I tell myself. I will make it here. The wheels to the hottest car I will drive will touch this gravel. I will be interviewed here. It doesn't matter whether my pants are getting soiled by the soil.
Am here, where judges and advocates, and magistrate thrive, where law lives, where civilized fights go on, a battle of wits.
It's almost my time. I touch the ground, I can feel it, I touch the walls, i believe it, its real, I walk to the court rooms, I touch the doors. The door is open, It is here. Concrete jungle.
This is where I will divide, conquer and thrive.
"hey?"
"whose there..."
The guard point his touch on me.
"Wewe ni nani?"
"what you doing here?"
"this is the court, tutakufunga in jail..."
I look at him and smile.
"I will be working here..."
"hapa ni pangu boss."
And I stand up from the stairs I sat on.
"I am Bob"
In a few years utaskia hiyo jina sana. He opens the gate, but I still jump over the fence. I don't need anyone to open for me the gate. I am coming in by myself, and I will thrive by myself.
They laugh.
I say bye even though they don't say bye back. Goes to proving Ino one will demotivated me, I get into the car. I drive back home counting the lights in the streets. They are in the thousands. I soil the steering with with soil from the parking lot. The leather seats too.
I drop my coat on the floor at the door, I kick my shoes out, I remove my trousers, they form a sort of foot print to my room. They will be picked up so I don't care. I have to much heart beat in my mind to care. My time is soon, and I will conquer.
I lie on the bed. I leave the curtains open. I want the stars to shine on me, they match the twinkle in my heart.
It feels nice doing what you love, even though you have fucked up, and the future isn't promising, if you decide you believe in better, and you can be the best. It will come...
I believe.
